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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27677804">for you i would ruin myself</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/queen_edmund_pevensie/pseuds/queen_edmund_pevensie'>queen_edmund_pevensie</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Advent 2020 [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 00:34:41</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>551</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27677804</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/queen_edmund_pevensie/pseuds/queen_edmund_pevensie</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>after padme is shot at a senate dinner, she shares a moment with anakin.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Padmé Amidala/Anakin Skywalker</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Advent 2020 [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2023931</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>for you i would ruin myself</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>from tumblr prompts: https://edmundsmercy.tumblr.com/post/629014997640642560/send-me-a-ship-and-one-of-these-and-ill-write-a#notes</p><p>#3 anidala -- things you said too quietly</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>things you said too quietly</em>
</p><p>“Sometimes,” Anakin breathes. “I think I’d die if you weren’t around.”</p><p>They have so little time together. It’s a shame that it’s spent like this, hiding away from the rest of the Senate just so Anakin can make romantic, breathy confessions that twist at Padme’s heart and make her feel uncertain about their future.</p><p>Anakin always volunteers for missions that involve being Padme’s Jedi security escort, or her Jedi liaison, or whenever her security detail needs a little support. Sometimes he volunteers when he’s on the other side of the Galaxy, and he almost always shows up, breezy and confident, telling tall tales of his exploits in the Clone Wars. But the second they’re alone, it’s like a sun collapsing in on itself.</p><p>Now, they’re hiding in a back room after a long boring dinner ended as it always did with Padme – nearly getting her head blown off by some political opponent. She’s over it, but she got nicked by a stray blaster bolt and Anakin’s hands are shaking as he patches her up, his fingers brushing her bare shoulder gently. She looks up at him, pulling the sleeve of her dress up and traces her fingers along his jawline.</p><p>“Don’t say things like that,” she says, pulling him into a kiss, but he stops himself just short of their lips meeting.</p><p>“I mean it –” His eyes flutter closed. They’re close enough that his eyelashes tickle her cheeks. Anyone could walk in. She thinks they ought to pull away, but she can’t. In Anakin’s gravitational pull, his breath hot on her face, it always feels like there is only the two of them in the whole universe, like the rest of the world just melts away. “It’s like I was made to love you.”</p><p>Anakin has lots of grand ideas about what he was made for, since he was certainly made for something. Padme doubts it was for her. She sighs, presses her forehead into Anakin’s, and pretend she doesn’t hear the footsteps coming down the hall. If it’s Typho, he’ll knock first, but there’s the building’s own security to think of, so after another blissful moment, she detaches herself from Anakin, presses a kiss to his forehead and stands up. Anakin follows close behind her, snagging her fingertips with his, as Padme opens the door to find Typho and every single one of her handmaidens waiting for her.</p><p>“I’m alright,” she assures them. “Has the shooter been detained?”</p><p>“Yes, my lady,” Typho says, staring at Anakin as he always does. He keeps their relationship quiet, but he hates doing it. “Shall we give you a minute?”</p><p>“Leave Yane here with me,” she says. “We’ll be out in a minute.”</p><p>“Yes, my lady.”</p><p>They leave, Yane staying behind, stoic, as she always is when on duty, but she watches Padme and Anakin closely. They’re all curious. Padme can’t blame them. It’s a relief that she doesn’t have to hide this from her handmaidens. Not completely. She turns, grabbing her cloak, letting go of Anakin’s hand. “Try to live for yourself, Ani,” she whispers. Anakin doesn’t react, so Padme thinks he maybe didn’t hear, but there’s no way to repeat herself, since Yane is leading them out, back into the hall, with a thousand eyes watching her.</p>
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